New Age Amazon

So, one of today’s trending topics on Twitter was #geekpickuplines. Here is a collected list of my contributions:

• As Yoda would say “Nice shoes you have, fuck me you should.”
• I can’t make you a summoner, baby, but I can make your horn rise >:)
• Forget the dungeon, you and I should move straight on to the boss fight
• Now keep in mind I can’t control when the sex begins or ends. Because I used those special parts to build my robot friends
• Touch me like I’m a Nintendo DS
• Make me scream like I’m Dinah Lance
• Marty, you have to go down…on my clit!
• The Justice League isn’t around, but you can still play with my Wonder Twins
• Wanna read my flavor text, baby?
• Tonight I’ll be your Khaleesi, but tomorrow night you’re my Red Viper. I
•  think you’re my epic destiny
• My name’s Betty and I’m on the rebound.
• Baby, I won’t just rock your world, I will rock your MULTIVERSE.
• I’ve got Mountain Dew flavored lube.
• Neta sa mega y lrulupu, pedlr! (Note: this is al bhed for “Ride me like a chocobo, bitch!”)
• I kiss like Jean Grey, but I fuck like The Phoenix.
• I’ll fuck you harder than the Kobayashi Maru

And my personal favorite: Baby, I love you so much that if Joss Whedon were writing our romance one of us would be dead by now.

(cross posted from my Buzznet)

So, MTV.com’s 10 days of Twilight is counting down to the release of the movie next Friday.  And in an article about Twilight star Kristen Stewart, the Twilight franchise was called “The Star Wars of our Generation.”


Bella: “Why you stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf herder!”

Now, many of you may think that I’m writing this blog to get indigent and outraged.  But since this particular suggestion is so utterly ridiculous, I’m already moving on to LULZ.

See, there are some fantastic quotes from Star Wars.  What happens when we give some of those quotes a little bit of Twilight-flavored “Dazzle” instead?

• “The Dazzle is an energy field created by all living things, it surrounds us, it penetrates us, it binds the galaxy together”
• “Forks High School, you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. We must be cautious.”
• “The Silver Volvo is the car that made castle run in less than twelve parsecs.”
• “Remember, a Vampire can feel the Dazzle flowing through him.”
• “Use the Dazzle, Edward.”
• This werewolf is my kind of scum… fearless and inventive.”
• “Strong am I with the Dazzle, but not that strong. Twilight is upon me and soon, night must fall. That is the way of things. The way of the Dazzle.”
• “The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Dazzle.”
• “The Dazzle is strong with this one.”
• “I find your lack of Dazzle disturbing.”
• “The Dazzle will be with you, always.”

However, if this whole thing leads up to a scene with Kristen Stewart in the Leia bikini, all will be forgiven.

…or even better: RPatz in the Leia bikini.