New Age Amazon

25th November 2009

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I ♥ Google Analytics

On November 19th, the day all this drama started, this Tumblr had two hits from the state of Colorado.  Both were from the city of Denver.

Both found the post via Twitter.  Both were the same person.  Who had been to my Tumblr before.

Yes, “someone anonymous” e-mailed you.  Uh-huh. 

Even if I didn’t have that info: the claim was that this person only visited my page when I posted something about them.  Orly?  Then I’d like to know how anyone could interpret this as being about you.

23rd November 2009

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Addressing an issue

Just came back from the truly amazing reading that Stephen Elliot did tonight in Pittsburgh.  It was a truly inspiring evening and did wonders to remind me that I’m a writer, that’s how I process information and how I perceive the world.  And it’s how I respond to stimuli.

And there has been no shortage of “stimuli” in the past few days.  But today it hit critical mass.  And a lot of things were said about people I genuinely care about that are nothing short of cruel, unnecessary hatemongering.  They are the last resort of someone who cannot build a decent argument without resorting to at best name calling and, at worst, bigotted temper tantrums.

So here is my piece to say about all of this.  Perhaps it’s my ego, but since a deal of this does revolve around me, I feel it’s only right.

I know people who communicate with pictures.  I know people who communicate with equations.  I know people who communicate with music.  I communicate with words.  But then there are those people who simply don’t or can’t communicate.  Attempting to relate to them in any form is generally useless.  You agree and they seek constant undeserved praise.  You disagree and you’re attacked and accused of “bullying” and discrimination.  You ask for clarification and you’re met with defensiveness and needless attacks.  You attempt to get along with them, you attempt to ignore them, you mock them.

And through it all, they seek you out.  They come looking for it.  They make up excuses, someone somewhere but I can’t say whom told me you said this about me.  When you do confront them about it, when they are caught red handed, they respond by taking down whatever they’ve said.

That offends me.  You don’t waste words.  If you are truly so fearless, so superior to me, why do you kill your words?  I’ve killed NONE of mine.  I’ve later said I was wrong, I’ve apologized, I’ve corrected myself and changed my opinion.  But I haven’t murdered words to make it look as if I’ve never been wrong or different.

And while I use words as weapons, I use slings and arrows, occasionally swords, but there are words which are assault rifles, nuclear arms, ones that need to be treatied and destroyed.  These are the words that I saw used as weapons against friends.  These are weapons which are not meant to wound but to outright kill.

I cannot stand to see such abuse of words.  I have held mine in this case because they would be wasted on the other party who ignores my words and substitutes their own, who puts their own words in my mouth while putting their own fears and twists in my head.  I sometimes aim to be a mirror to the world, but I am no one’s personal looking glass, Alice.